Savage Love Fest

I just saw this on the Slog. I loved it too much to keep it to myself, even though I think BEM reads the bloody thing as much as I do. Anyway, if you can get past the weirdness of the letter, all the "imaginings" and "believings," which Dan is graceful enough not to mention, the whole thing is beautiful. Just the kind of pick-me-up we all need on the eve of the inauguration and Bush's last night in office. Enjoy.

Savage Love Letter of the Day

Posted by Dan Savage on Mon, Jan 19 at 2:06 PM

In your response to "Faithful Obama Girl" you refer to Rick Warren as a "gay-hatin', right-wing Christian bigot." I found this confusing. I can understand that he represents a political/social faction which has an agenda opposed to your own. I can also imagine that I can not even begin to imagine how any criticism of a gay lifestyle takes a sinister aura when it has a religious basis. However, is it accurate to describe Warren this way? Certainly, he does speak against the gay lifestyle, but would you say that anyone who does this is a hateful bigot? Is there a difference between the beliefs of Rick Warren and those of Fred Phelps?

I could understand if you described Warren (or myself) as a dangerously deluded Christian fanatic because you believe that our beliefs naturally lead towards the hateful bigotry of Phelps. I would disagree but differentiate between that description and the one you gave.

A Biblical Christian

Rick warren is Fred Phelps plus 100 pounds and a smile.

You can speak against the gay lifestyle without being bigoted. There are certainly aspects of "the gay lifestyle" that trouble me, and I'm as gay guys get. You'll certainly find examples of me taking gay men to task if you read through the "Savage Love" archives. But a person can't insist that people shouldn't be gay, or that gay people shouldn't have relationships, or that gay people shouldn't be parents or adopt, or that being gay is a sinful choice, without being considered a bigot.

Imagine if I told you that I only hated "the Christian lifestyle," and not, you know, actual Christians. Hey, nothing personal! I know and like tons of individual Christians, and I've broken bread with Christians, and I've had Christians over to my house. But I nevertheless think that Christianity—just the practice, not the people—is immoral and that no one needs to be Christian—it's a lifestyle choice, and Christians can change! Indeed, I was a Christian once. And while I have great affection for Christians I also believe that no one who is Christian is fit to parent, that Christians should not be allowed to marry or adopt, and that Christians aren't going to heaven because my God condemns their immoral lifestyle.

Oh, and I also believe that Christians being allowed to marry infringes upon my right to, um, live in a world where Christians do not enjoy that right.

Would you consider me an anti-Christian bigot then? I expect you would, ABC, and you'd be right.